Thankful

Depending on your perspective, today is either Thanksgiving, Turkey Day, or if you are a Native American the National Day of Mourning. Today I will sit down with my wife, our son, her family as well as my mom who is visiting for the week from Denmark and we will both celebrate and mourn the day. I should explain the mourning- my wife’s family has quite a lot of Native American heritage, and in addition my brother’s wife is actually an Inuit from Greenland, so as a family this particular season is one of both happiness and sadness. As we always do we will go visit Tiana’s Aunt Pat, who due to my wife’s celiac disease has purchased and prepared a gluten free Turkey. In addition to the Turkey and the Ham, there will be all the bells and whistles that you can expect from the occasion. From mashed to hasselbaked potatoes, Pat’s delicious dinner rolls and the stuffing (I personally try to avoid this, since I can’t figure out what it really is) we will fill our bellies with plenty of carbs. There will be cake, both the kinds with Gluten and the ones without. (If you haven’t tried the gluten free sweets yet, give them a chance, they can be quite good).

As we men gather around the television to consume our loads of meat and carbs the Arlington Cowboys will once again be playing the Washington Redskins (considering the day from a Native American perspective I think a better choice of matchup by the NFL might have been more appropriate). I hear the Cowboys are doing well, though as a Packer fan who at this point only care to watch the Packers on a regular basis this will actually be the first time I watch ‘them boys’ this season. Yeah Romo, or is it Dak? In this room the men will try their hardest to avoid any meaningful conversation about politics, society or feelings, and will instead recap the  success of each Cowboy play, the failure of the Rangers to move past the Blue Jays, and if I have my way how even though the Mavs are currently 2-12 with a worst record then the freaking sixers, this is actually a good thing as Harrison Barnes is found and we will get a chance to get the first pick in draft and be back to winning the Larry O’Brien next season, or something. No one will mention the Stars unless they are doing well, because this is Texas and not Canada.

In the other room the ladies will be consumed in a conversation about something else then sports, or at least I assume so. As I have male parts I am not invited to that room, and my wife never tells me what they actually talk about, nor do I ask. On the telly in the background the National Dog Show will play. The fact that such a thing is televised and watched on one of the biggest television days of the year is one of those cultural differences that I will forever be baffled by.

All in all we can look forward to a warm day and if we can avoid the political conversations and confrontations that currently seem to be so easy to get into, it will likely be a very lovely day for a group of people that have a lot to be thankful for.

For others this is not so much the case. As I was walking home from the store with my family yesterday (we live close by our grocery store and prefer to walk it rather then drive there) my wife told me she had received a text earlier that day from one of the board members on from our HOA. If you have read one of my previous posts you will know that I have a slightly challenged relationship with our HOA, and the moment she told me the hairs on my back stood up and I was bracing for the worst. As expected they did not disappoint. This time the board didn’t complain about us, but instead provided a warning that the homeless people living under a nearby bridge had been seen walking in our community looking into cars for blankets and coats. We live in a pretty nice neighborhood where honestly crimes hardly ever happens. But there are homeless people in our neighborhood, just like in cities everywhere else. The thing that got me though was the timing and the complete lack of compassion. If you haven’t been to Texas, I bet you have a picture of this state as a place that is only a couple of degrees colder then hell, and for the summer you would be right. But when the winter comes, and it does now no thanks to climate change, it gets really cold here. Not Minnesota Cold, but plenty cold. Instead of addressing that there are people, neighbors in fact who are struggling to cope with the cold, all this HOA person cared about was stoking the sense of fear.

Fear for his property. Fear of the suffering. Fear of the world around us.

I am a fortunate man. I have a wife and a son who loves me. I am well educated and have a great career, where I am surrounded by people that appreciate me and a company that elevates me. I make good money. I have a beautiful Condo. I am well feed. I keep myself cold in the summer and warm in the winter. If I don’t seek out suffering it does not find me. But in that moment as my wife told me about this message I just couldn’t. No I will not accept that hate, and so after getting home, I got in my car, I drove to Target to get blankets, hats, gloves and food for the people under the bridge. I didn’t care how much I spent. I didn’t care that I didn’t know the folks down there. All I cared about was undoing a little bit of the fear that had manifested itself.

With my car packed with supplies I made it down to the bridge. It was night and the darkness surrounded the couple of card board houses they had built. At first as I approached, it seemed like there was no one there. Except for the cars passing above, silence ruled the night. I shouted out, I am here with blankets and food. After a while a lady stepped out, as she did I could see the small fire she had been kindling to stay warm in her hut. We reached one another, I could see the befuddlement on her face. It was clear that she did not get many visitors or even many that talked to her. I gave her the bags I was bringing and as she realized the gifts, where just that gifts, she gave me the greatest gift, one far greater than mine. The gift of a genuine smile and thankfulness. More than anything I am thankful that she dispelled the fear that was seeded in the message from the HOA. Thank you.

Today, or tomorrow I hope that some of you, if not all, will do something similar. Reach out and give something to someone that needs it. It doesn’t have to be the lady under the bridge, but there is someone out there who could use your help. Give it.